For the first 37 years of my life, I strived to be who everyone wants me to be. I yearned to fit into the mold of perfection in every area of my life. And, in doing so, I masked my true self at every turn.

When people would compliment me on something I was wearing, doing or saying, I would blithely thank them and play it down. Then, I’d play that compliment again and again until it became my new standard.

Once someone told me the cheesecake I’d made was THE best cheesecake they’d ever eaten. That compliment first made me feel good about myself. But then, it made me crazy-obsessed about always making THE best cheesecake.

I was so caught up in being all things to all people so that I’d feel loved and accepted.

The result: I strived for perfection in everything I did. All the time. Leave the house without make-up and a carefully matched outfit? Of course not. Send out Christmas cards that did not match my Christmas wrap? Not happening. Host an event without a perfectly executed theme? Over my dead body.

It wasn’t that I wanted others to feel bad about themselves or their mismatched cards and gift wrap. No, I just wanted them to feel good about me.

This obsessive-compulsive fixation on being perfect and being accepted continued until one morning I woke up and didn’t recognize myself. I didn’t know who I was anymore, because I wasn’t me. I was so many different things to so many people, and very few of them actually reflected me at all.

Not knowing who you are is scary.

It’s the kind of thing that catapults you into a breakdown or a breakthrough. In either case, you’re breaking something. Breaking free from the prison. Breaking out of the mold you let everyone cast for you. Breaking away from the things and people who only loved you for what you were, not who you were.

And guess what? It’s lonely. Because suddenly you’re not what you once were. And you don’t even know what you are, but everyone you once tried to please is unhappy with you. They notice the change way before you do. And they don’t like it. It scares them, because you’re being real and they can’t pretend otherwise.

You’re done pretending too.

Your perspective of yourself has changed. You just want to be who you are, ugly mess and all. You're done with the fairy godmothers and their glass slippers. You’re tired of the masquerade. You want to dance at the ball in your rags. And you just want someone to love you for you, not for what you do.

That’s when your Father God whispers to you, “I knew you before you were in your mother’s womb. Before you were born, I set you apart.” (Jer. 1:5)

That unconditional love and acceptance that He offers you is what empowers you to strip away the layers. And in doing so, you realize you haven’t changed. You’ve just discovered who you really are.

When you peel back all THAT you are, WHO are you?  How does it make you feel to know that God knows the real you, made you that way and loves all of you?